Nursing. It is such an emotionally-charged subject! Everywhere you turn there are people with opinions about nursing vs. formula, nursing in public, working moms and nursing, pumping, etc. I just wanted to share my personal experience and suggest a few products that I think made my life easier while I was on that journey.
Before my daughter was born, I was not really enthusiastic about nursing. I planned to breastfeed because I knew it was the best nutrition for my child*, but I wasn't really invested in it. I figured I would nurse for 3-4 months and then give over to formula once I went back to work. *Both the American Academy of Pediatrics and the World Health Organization recommend breastfeeding as the best nutrition for infants.
When my daughter was born, a primal instinct appeared in me and suddenly I was convinced that I needed to nurse! It suddenly meant SO MUCH more to me that my child be nourished the best way I knew how. Unfortunately for me, the hospital was not much help while I was there immediately following birth. To begin, I wasn't able to nurse her until almost 5 hours after her birth. This was due to many factors - my doctor/nurses did not let me hold her until she was at least an hour old (even though she was healthy with no signs of distress), I didn't know that I needed to politely excuse myself from my visitors to attempt to nurse her, and my nurses were not helpful when I had questions about how to nurse. In the middle of the night on the only night that I stayed in the hospital, I called for a nurse because I knew she wasn't latching properly and I didn't know what to do to fix it. The nurse's advice was simple and not really helpful: just keep doing it and maybe she'll catch on. No one even mentioned to me that there was a lactation consultant on call until I was already home from the hospital! What I didn't know was that my sweet baby was not latching properly.
My daughter was born on Thursday evening. By Sunday morning my breasts were in such excruciating pain that I called my mom and begged her to please find an open store that had the pumping accessories I needed so that I could pump milk for her and give my body a rest. Unfortunately no such store was open on a Sunday, so on Monday morning my mom came to the rescue. By then I would actually cry while I nursed, and would wince as soon as I heard my girl stirring, knowing that it meant more nursing and more pain. No one told me that nursing takes work. No one told me that nursing is painful at first. No one told me about latching or how to make sure it was correct.
Monday afternoon after the pump had been assembled and sterilized, I was proud to produce a bottle of milk for my daughter. Thankfully she caught on quickly and went right for it! I spent the next few days alternating between pumping and nursing at the breast, trying to rest my body and still give her what I knew she needed. This was such a dark time that I barely shared with anyone - even my husband - how much I struggled.
At two weeks postpartum, my husband convinced me to call the lactation consultant at the hospital. As we drove to the appointment, I told him how guilty I felt for not nursing properly, how much a failure I felt for not making this work. We discussed our options, solutions that we could come up with, and we agreed - if the LC (lactation consultant) had a viable solution that we could try, we would. But if her advice was simply "try harder" or "keep trying" or something else less specific, we would give up and switch to formula.
Thankfully, the LC did have a couple suggestions - one, she reminded me that we were probably experiencing the 2-week growth spurt, which would explain her insatiable need to nurse, and she helped me understand latching a little better. Of course, under scrutiny, the little girl performed perfectly and didn't display half of the issues I had had in the past 2 weeks. (Get used to that - kids don't perform anything on demand.)
Here's the short version of the rest of the story: nursing never took off for us for a number of reasons.
1) Poor support from the hospital at the time of birth.
2) Lack of knowledge on my part. I didn't take any classes or read any books - I just thought it was something natural that just happened on its own. I was wrong.
3) Poor latch on my daughter's part/my own fault for not being prepared to help this issue.
4) Society in general lacking in both knowledge and support for nursing mothers.
5) I still entertain the guilt that I should have tried harder, that I could have done more, and that I failed her. I doubt I will outgrow this.
One last thing to add: even with my experience, I'm still firmly convinced of nursing as the right choice for our family, and I will make my best attempts to nurse any future children I have. I actually have high hopes that I will do better next time, now that I know what I have learned the first time around.
On to the positives - here are some things that helped!
1) Lactation consultant! If your hospital doesn't have one on call, you can find one through resources like the International Lactation Consultant Association and La Leche League. Ask for help!! I failed do this soon enough and often enough.
2) Spilled Milk - I already reviewed this book in my post about Pregnancy/Parenting Books, but I'm putting it here also because this was such a relief to my emotional journey through nursing.
3) Nipple Shield - It's not necessary, and if you don't need it, don't use it. But if you are finding that you have troubles with latching and pain, this can help force baby to latch better while giving your skin time to heal up a bit. This is not a one-size-fits-all device. Find the correct size for you!
4) Medela Lactina Select breast pump - I was blessed beyond belief that a family friend was kind and generous enough to allow me to borrow her expensive hospital-grade breast pump. If you have the means I highly recommend renting one of these from the hospital (you will have to purchase your own pump accessory kit to go with it).
5) Manual breast pump - this is what I had for the first couple days before I was rescued by my mom and the Medela. I had an Ameda single manual breast pump, but if I were to use another manual I would get either a lever-style like this, or a cylinder style like this. I have recommendations from others that the cylinder style is better at stripping the milk all the way out, but I have not personally used one.
6) Simplisse breast milk bags - I much preferred these to the Lansinoh bags. The Lansinoh bags had problems with leaking and splitting in the freezer, but I never had a problem with the Simplisse. If you use bags, there is a tutorial you should read about how to rotate bags easily in the freezer using a used gift bag. Genius!
7) Next time around, I want to get one of these breast milk freezer trays.
8) Lansinoh lanolin cream - wonderful for sore breasts! Also, use your leftovers for chapped lips, or chapped noses when you get a cold and have to blow your nose one too many times, and for baby's chapped cheeks if your baby is a drooler/teether during the winter months.
9) Lansinoh breast pads - I really appreciated the adhesive on these, and they were the softest ones I used. Some women don't leak at all, some women leak a lot. Some women, like me, leak at the sound of a baby crying, even if it's not their own baby. (I have a very awkward memory of a church function trying to hide my leakage from a group of men when another person's baby started crying in the the hallway outside the sanctuary...)
10) Nursing cover - I'm a private person. Regardless of the fact that many women feel comfortable nursing in public, I do not. Frankly, I don't mind at all if other women nurse uncovered near me - but I personally am not comfortable doing it without some privacy. Also, at the beginning when you're still trying to figure out the latch, and/or if you need to use a nipple shield, it's not a simple transaction to do without a cover. These covers can run quite a difference in price range - if you're a seamstress, you might be better off making your own.
11) Nursing tanks - These are great to wear in the hospital when you're just figuring things out, and also great as you continue your nursing relationship with your baby. Stock up when you find them at a good price!!
Sunday, June 24, 2012
Monday, June 18, 2012
Baby Food!
It's trending right now - making your own baby food. There are a lot of products out there to aid moms along in this. Here was my experience:
While I was still pregnant, I read an article about baby's tastes. It said that if you could get your child to consistently eat at least one (preferably more!) thing from each family group of fruits, veggies, grains, dairy and meat, that their diets would be set for life. Sounds great, right?? That sounded like a good deal to me, and I set out to accomplish this goal. I love to cook, and the prospect of making my own baby food was really exciting. Also, I figured I could probably save money by buying fruits/veggies in bulk and freezing the food as needed. Oh, my intentions were wonderful and my expectations were oh-so-high.
This website was my main resource for recipes, tips on freezing and age limits. It was really helpful, and I highly recommend it! I was armed with this website, my food processor (a regular Kitchen Aid, not the baby variety), and my steamer basket on my pasta pot.
I cooked, pureed and froze the following: apples, blueberries, cherries, mangoes, melons, pears, peaches, prunes, pumpkin, strawberries, asparagus, green beans, broccoli, butternut squash, carrots, cauliflower, parsnips, peas, sweet potatoes, spinach, zucchini and yellow summer squash. (She was also given mashed bananas and mashed avocado, but those were not cooked or frozen.)
I was so excited to share these with my sweet baby! On the whole - she loved it! She ate almost everything I listed without much protest. Peaches weren't her favorite, but I figured everyone's bound to have a couple things they don't like, right?
After the fact, here's what I would say about the cooking/prep:
- I don't see why a baby food processor is necessary. They're probably nice, but I didn't need one.
- Next time, I would invest in a food mill. They are helpful for meats and foods like green beans and peas that have thicker skins/stringy fibers.
- Peas were by far the hardest. I gave up and bought peas in the jar. Not only do you need to puree them, but they must also be strained by hand to keep the skins out, since they are a choking hazard.
- I really love that you can get a lot more variety with making your own food than what you can get from commercial baby food jars, although brands like Plum Organics, Ella's Kitchen and Happy Baby are fast closing that gap!
- It's really helpful to freeze the purees in ice cube trays, and then transfer the cubes to a freezer bag. Then you can take out individual portions whenever you need them, and the rest stay preserved.
About the pureeing method - it's great for a lot of people, but next time I think I will be trying Baby-Led Solids. If the next baby wants purees, that's fine too - but unfortunately for me, I have a little girl who is almost 2 who doesn't eat table food. She'd much rather have purees (most of which I now buy from the companies listed above), and she doesn't like textures much at all. I felt like doing a dance this week when she tried whole blueberries. I don't completely blame the purees, but I think if I'd given her more exposure to food in its solid form, we'd have less of this problem.
Baby Food/Solid Feeding products reviews:
- I've already mentioned the Plum Organics, Ella's Kitchen and Happy Baby food - they make these handy-dandy pouches that the babies can use to feed themselves. They are great at home or on the go, they are wholesome varieties of organic foods, and my daughter loves them. Gerber Organics has also just introduced a line of pouches, as has Babies R Us.
- The Munchkin Snack Catcher might be the smartest thing ever. Okay, probably not - but it's still pretty nifty! You can pour snacks into it - puffs, cereal, raisins, etc - the child can get a few at a time without spilling them out! A word of warning: this works really well until said child grows up, gets smarter and more curious, and realizes that she can rake her hand in and out and spill them all over the place.
- These bowls are great - it's a really good idea to get bowls with lids. Your child will most likely not eat all of their food every single time (ha!) and you'll want to be prepared for leftovers.
- If you're doing purees, the Gerber soft-tip spoons are the ones to get. It will tell you if the food is too hot, and baby will be able to get all the food off of the spoon. Some of the other spoons are too deep and they can't get all the food out of the middle.
- I'm intrigued by the Boon food dispensing spoons, but I haven't actually tried them.
- I don't like the Nuby spoons. They were too long, so there's less control for the feeder, the baby definitely can't use them to feed themselves because the spoon-to-mouth ratio is off, and they are too deep, so they baby can't actually get all the food that's in the spoon. I use these to stir my own coffee in the morning.
- We tried these food teethers for my daughter when she was teething, but she never liked them. In fact, she didn't like ANY teething device.
While I was still pregnant, I read an article about baby's tastes. It said that if you could get your child to consistently eat at least one (preferably more!) thing from each family group of fruits, veggies, grains, dairy and meat, that their diets would be set for life. Sounds great, right?? That sounded like a good deal to me, and I set out to accomplish this goal. I love to cook, and the prospect of making my own baby food was really exciting. Also, I figured I could probably save money by buying fruits/veggies in bulk and freezing the food as needed. Oh, my intentions were wonderful and my expectations were oh-so-high.
This website was my main resource for recipes, tips on freezing and age limits. It was really helpful, and I highly recommend it! I was armed with this website, my food processor (a regular Kitchen Aid, not the baby variety), and my steamer basket on my pasta pot.
I cooked, pureed and froze the following: apples, blueberries, cherries, mangoes, melons, pears, peaches, prunes, pumpkin, strawberries, asparagus, green beans, broccoli, butternut squash, carrots, cauliflower, parsnips, peas, sweet potatoes, spinach, zucchini and yellow summer squash. (She was also given mashed bananas and mashed avocado, but those were not cooked or frozen.)
I was so excited to share these with my sweet baby! On the whole - she loved it! She ate almost everything I listed without much protest. Peaches weren't her favorite, but I figured everyone's bound to have a couple things they don't like, right?
After the fact, here's what I would say about the cooking/prep:
- I don't see why a baby food processor is necessary. They're probably nice, but I didn't need one.
- Next time, I would invest in a food mill. They are helpful for meats and foods like green beans and peas that have thicker skins/stringy fibers.
- Peas were by far the hardest. I gave up and bought peas in the jar. Not only do you need to puree them, but they must also be strained by hand to keep the skins out, since they are a choking hazard.
- I really love that you can get a lot more variety with making your own food than what you can get from commercial baby food jars, although brands like Plum Organics, Ella's Kitchen and Happy Baby are fast closing that gap!
- It's really helpful to freeze the purees in ice cube trays, and then transfer the cubes to a freezer bag. Then you can take out individual portions whenever you need them, and the rest stay preserved.
About the pureeing method - it's great for a lot of people, but next time I think I will be trying Baby-Led Solids. If the next baby wants purees, that's fine too - but unfortunately for me, I have a little girl who is almost 2 who doesn't eat table food. She'd much rather have purees (most of which I now buy from the companies listed above), and she doesn't like textures much at all. I felt like doing a dance this week when she tried whole blueberries. I don't completely blame the purees, but I think if I'd given her more exposure to food in its solid form, we'd have less of this problem.
Baby Food/Solid Feeding products reviews:
- I've already mentioned the Plum Organics, Ella's Kitchen and Happy Baby food - they make these handy-dandy pouches that the babies can use to feed themselves. They are great at home or on the go, they are wholesome varieties of organic foods, and my daughter loves them. Gerber Organics has also just introduced a line of pouches, as has Babies R Us.
- The Munchkin Snack Catcher might be the smartest thing ever. Okay, probably not - but it's still pretty nifty! You can pour snacks into it - puffs, cereal, raisins, etc - the child can get a few at a time without spilling them out! A word of warning: this works really well until said child grows up, gets smarter and more curious, and realizes that she can rake her hand in and out and spill them all over the place.
- These bowls are great - it's a really good idea to get bowls with lids. Your child will most likely not eat all of their food every single time (ha!) and you'll want to be prepared for leftovers.
- If you're doing purees, the Gerber soft-tip spoons are the ones to get. It will tell you if the food is too hot, and baby will be able to get all the food off of the spoon. Some of the other spoons are too deep and they can't get all the food out of the middle.
- I'm intrigued by the Boon food dispensing spoons, but I haven't actually tried them.
- I don't like the Nuby spoons. They were too long, so there's less control for the feeder, the baby definitely can't use them to feed themselves because the spoon-to-mouth ratio is off, and they are too deep, so they baby can't actually get all the food that's in the spoon. I use these to stir my own coffee in the morning.
- We tried these food teethers for my daughter when she was teething, but she never liked them. In fact, she didn't like ANY teething device.
Saturday, June 16, 2012
Bottle Feeding
Most mommies will use a bottle with their baby at some point, whether it's expressed breast milk or formula. I was planning to nurse my daughter, but nursing did not go well for us and I ended up exclusively pumping (EP'ing) for her for 5 months until my supply died down and we switched to formula. That story might get posted at another time, but for now I'll discuss my experience with bottles and accessories.
We used only used one type of bottle with our daughter: the Playtex Drop-ins nursers. I really loved them, and had no reason to try any others. Some people do have to try several to find one that their child will accept, but she latched right on to these.
For those of you who don't know, when my daughter was born we were still in the middle of a major (unplanned) house renovation. I was just grateful to be moved back into my house with a running toilet before she was born! My kitchen had a stove and a fridge, but there was no kitchen sink to wash bottles in, no cabinets, no countertops. It was somewhat primitive! My bottle choice definitely was affected by that situation, but given our wonderful experience with them, I wouldn't make a different choice even if given the chance.
Pros:
- If breastfeeding, you can pour the pumped milk right into the drop-in liner and store in the fridge for later use, or use right then.
- If formula feeding, formula can be mixed in these just like any other bottle.
- The collapsing nature of the liner mimics the breast and reduces gas, therefore reducing the chances for a gassy, fussy baby.
- The pieces are easy to clean and store.
- There are multiple flow nipples so that you can choose the one that best matches your natural flow, if nursing. (Start with slow and work up to the faster ones - too fast will make for a gassy baby also.)
- When a bottle accidentally gets left out (rolls under the seat of a car, under the couch, left outside, left in the car, etc) if the milk sours, you can just toss the liner and not try to get the nasty smell out of a plastic bottle.
- Bottles can be warmed with just warm water in a shorter time because the liner is thinner than regular bottle sides.
- I prefer the wider nipple structure because it mimics the breast shape. This is important for moms whose babies go between breast and bottle (working moms, EP'ing moms, etc).
Cons:
- Purchasing extra liners is an expense that you wouldn't have with a traditional bottle. However, I did reuse mine to stretch them out longer. The company recommends not reusing them, but that's mostly because they can't guarantee sterilization after that. If you feel confident that you're getting them clean, reuse them a few times before pitching them. Also, Parents Choice (Walmart brand) makes liners that fit the Playtex bottles and are less expensive. They are slightly less in quality, but definitely will save you some money.
- Some reviewers have complained of leakage, but that only happened to me twice. Once, I did not have the lid screwed on properly, so it was a quick fix of just taking it off and putting it back on. The second time there was a hole in the liner, and I'm not sure if it was there when new, or if I accidentally punctured it somehow. Either is possible. But twice in 15 months of use is really not that much, so I don't really see this as a significant reason not to use these bottles.
- NOT microwave safe. You should be very careful about warming baby bottles in the microwave for several reasons (burning baby and it kills enzymes in breastmilk), but do not ever microwave these bottles. The plastic will melt!
- I've read some reviews about these bottles melting a bottle warmer. However, one of the other points I was already planning to make about bottle accessories was this: I think a bottle warmer is totally unnecessary. Most babies I have been around will drink milk if it is either warm or room temp (some babies will drink it cold from the fridge, but that's less common). Just warm the bottle under running hot water in the sink, or in a bowl of standing hot water. No need for an extra $30 spent on a bottle warmer.
Accessories:
- For reasons already mentioned, I personally think bottle warmers are completely unnecessary.
- I never used a drying rack or sterilizer. I used my dishwasher to wash/sterilize my bottles and pump parts. I can see the appeal if you don't have a dishwasher, but even before my dishwasher was hooked up in my kitchen, I didn't use one.
- Formula dispenser - VERY handy gadget for formula feeding mommies! No need to measure out formula in a parking lot, store, bathroom (ew, unsanitary!), or other random public place. Just pre-measure the amounts in this dispenser and then pour into baby's bottle and add water! Kudos to the inventor of this one.
- Dishwasher basket - super handy gadget right here! If you have a dishwasher, these baskets will hold all the small bottle parts and keep them safe while sterilizing in the dishwasher. Also, later on they are great for toddler things like sippy cup valves and lids, etc. I use them for other small dishes occasionally too!
- Formula Pitcher - I thought this was going to be a great idea, but it turned out I didn't need it. It was nice to have bottles pre-made, but since you have to refrigerate formula after you mix it, the whole pitcher went in the fridge, and when it was time to make a bottle, I had to take the time to warm it up. So it doesn't really save any time at the point of feeding time - you're either going to spend time mixing the bottle, or spend time warming it up.
We used only used one type of bottle with our daughter: the Playtex Drop-ins nursers. I really loved them, and had no reason to try any others. Some people do have to try several to find one that their child will accept, but she latched right on to these.
For those of you who don't know, when my daughter was born we were still in the middle of a major (unplanned) house renovation. I was just grateful to be moved back into my house with a running toilet before she was born! My kitchen had a stove and a fridge, but there was no kitchen sink to wash bottles in, no cabinets, no countertops. It was somewhat primitive! My bottle choice definitely was affected by that situation, but given our wonderful experience with them, I wouldn't make a different choice even if given the chance.
Pros:
- If breastfeeding, you can pour the pumped milk right into the drop-in liner and store in the fridge for later use, or use right then.
- If formula feeding, formula can be mixed in these just like any other bottle.
- The collapsing nature of the liner mimics the breast and reduces gas, therefore reducing the chances for a gassy, fussy baby.
- The pieces are easy to clean and store.
- There are multiple flow nipples so that you can choose the one that best matches your natural flow, if nursing. (Start with slow and work up to the faster ones - too fast will make for a gassy baby also.)
- When a bottle accidentally gets left out (rolls under the seat of a car, under the couch, left outside, left in the car, etc) if the milk sours, you can just toss the liner and not try to get the nasty smell out of a plastic bottle.
- Bottles can be warmed with just warm water in a shorter time because the liner is thinner than regular bottle sides.
- I prefer the wider nipple structure because it mimics the breast shape. This is important for moms whose babies go between breast and bottle (working moms, EP'ing moms, etc).
Cons:
- Purchasing extra liners is an expense that you wouldn't have with a traditional bottle. However, I did reuse mine to stretch them out longer. The company recommends not reusing them, but that's mostly because they can't guarantee sterilization after that. If you feel confident that you're getting them clean, reuse them a few times before pitching them. Also, Parents Choice (Walmart brand) makes liners that fit the Playtex bottles and are less expensive. They are slightly less in quality, but definitely will save you some money.
- Some reviewers have complained of leakage, but that only happened to me twice. Once, I did not have the lid screwed on properly, so it was a quick fix of just taking it off and putting it back on. The second time there was a hole in the liner, and I'm not sure if it was there when new, or if I accidentally punctured it somehow. Either is possible. But twice in 15 months of use is really not that much, so I don't really see this as a significant reason not to use these bottles.
- NOT microwave safe. You should be very careful about warming baby bottles in the microwave for several reasons (burning baby and it kills enzymes in breastmilk), but do not ever microwave these bottles. The plastic will melt!
- I've read some reviews about these bottles melting a bottle warmer. However, one of the other points I was already planning to make about bottle accessories was this: I think a bottle warmer is totally unnecessary. Most babies I have been around will drink milk if it is either warm or room temp (some babies will drink it cold from the fridge, but that's less common). Just warm the bottle under running hot water in the sink, or in a bowl of standing hot water. No need for an extra $30 spent on a bottle warmer.
Accessories:
- For reasons already mentioned, I personally think bottle warmers are completely unnecessary.
- I never used a drying rack or sterilizer. I used my dishwasher to wash/sterilize my bottles and pump parts. I can see the appeal if you don't have a dishwasher, but even before my dishwasher was hooked up in my kitchen, I didn't use one.
- Formula dispenser - VERY handy gadget for formula feeding mommies! No need to measure out formula in a parking lot, store, bathroom (ew, unsanitary!), or other random public place. Just pre-measure the amounts in this dispenser and then pour into baby's bottle and add water! Kudos to the inventor of this one.
- Dishwasher basket - super handy gadget right here! If you have a dishwasher, these baskets will hold all the small bottle parts and keep them safe while sterilizing in the dishwasher. Also, later on they are great for toddler things like sippy cup valves and lids, etc. I use them for other small dishes occasionally too!
- Formula Pitcher - I thought this was going to be a great idea, but it turned out I didn't need it. It was nice to have bottles pre-made, but since you have to refrigerate formula after you mix it, the whole pitcher went in the fridge, and when it was time to make a bottle, I had to take the time to warm it up. So it doesn't really save any time at the point of feeding time - you're either going to spend time mixing the bottle, or spend time warming it up.
Monday, June 11, 2012
Pregnancy/Parenting Books
There are so many pregnancy/parenting books that trying to choose which ones to read can be quite overwhelming. My mother-in-law loaned me her library of pregnancy/parenting books when I was pregnant, and I got some additional suggestions from others who have been pregnant more recently. There was a lot of information to sift through, but I was so glad to have all these resources.
Pregnancy Week by Week - This was my absolute favorite. For the beginning weeks, it has pictures and actual size representations for the baby, so you can put into perspective how much your little one is growing over time. I also really liked that there was a variety of information regarding symptoms, what causes them, solutions to them, how to stay healthy, a few warning signs to look for and some planning ideas along the way. It was overall a very positive book and helpful resource at the same time.
What to Expect When You're Expecting - You know, I'm sure when this book first came out, it was considered a really awesome resource by our moms. It has a lot of helpful information and insight into pregnancy. My problem with it was simple: it has a fairly negative and outdated tone that often focuses on things that can go wrong in pregnancy. Most moms have a normal overactive fear of things going wrong during their pregnancy anyway, so while its good to know certain warning signs and things to be wary of, there needs to be a balance of sensitivity for Mama's emotions that seems lacking in this book.
Spilled Milk - I struggled a lot with nursing and I wish I had found this book sooner! By the time I'd found it and read it, I was already weaning my daughter to formula. A lot of the breastfeeding books out there have a harsh tone and (probably unintentionally) incite guilt if the nursing relationship doesn't go well. They're still great resources, but for someone who is really struggling, it can do more harm than good. I've had other friends confirm my feelings about this, one of whom suggested this book as an alternative. It's got a healthy balance of truth, comedy and realism. Great read!
Belly Laughs - This one isn't meant to be a resource but rather a comedic escape for the pregnant ladies! It does have some coarse language (consider yourself warned!) but it was such a good companion on those nights of insomnia and self-doubt.
Husband-Coached Childbirth - I really loved this book. Things didn't go quite as planned for my birth, but this was a really great book for helping me understand by body and how it was designed to give birth. There were a few parts that I somewhat mentally discarded, but that's something all mothers have to get used to doing anyway.
I'm currently reading Give Them Grace, and I aspire to read Ina May's Guide to Childbirth, so maybe I will come back and review them later.
Pregnancy Week by Week - This was my absolute favorite. For the beginning weeks, it has pictures and actual size representations for the baby, so you can put into perspective how much your little one is growing over time. I also really liked that there was a variety of information regarding symptoms, what causes them, solutions to them, how to stay healthy, a few warning signs to look for and some planning ideas along the way. It was overall a very positive book and helpful resource at the same time.
What to Expect When You're Expecting - You know, I'm sure when this book first came out, it was considered a really awesome resource by our moms. It has a lot of helpful information and insight into pregnancy. My problem with it was simple: it has a fairly negative and outdated tone that often focuses on things that can go wrong in pregnancy. Most moms have a normal overactive fear of things going wrong during their pregnancy anyway, so while its good to know certain warning signs and things to be wary of, there needs to be a balance of sensitivity for Mama's emotions that seems lacking in this book.
Spilled Milk - I struggled a lot with nursing and I wish I had found this book sooner! By the time I'd found it and read it, I was already weaning my daughter to formula. A lot of the breastfeeding books out there have a harsh tone and (probably unintentionally) incite guilt if the nursing relationship doesn't go well. They're still great resources, but for someone who is really struggling, it can do more harm than good. I've had other friends confirm my feelings about this, one of whom suggested this book as an alternative. It's got a healthy balance of truth, comedy and realism. Great read!
Belly Laughs - This one isn't meant to be a resource but rather a comedic escape for the pregnant ladies! It does have some coarse language (consider yourself warned!) but it was such a good companion on those nights of insomnia and self-doubt.
Husband-Coached Childbirth - I really loved this book. Things didn't go quite as planned for my birth, but this was a really great book for helping me understand by body and how it was designed to give birth. There were a few parts that I somewhat mentally discarded, but that's something all mothers have to get used to doing anyway.
I'm currently reading Give Them Grace, and I aspire to read Ina May's Guide to Childbirth, so maybe I will come back and review them later.
Car Seats!
There are a lot of things to consider when choosing a car seat. Here are some that come to mind:
- Will you be using both an infant seat and convertible car seat, or will you be using a convertible one right from the start? We used an infant seat (I call it 'the bucket') from the time my daughter was born to the time she outgrew the weight limit at 7 months. Check the weight limits on the car seats you're buying - for us the 22 lb limit was not enough to last past 7 months. I do like the ease of use with an infant seat, though. It's simple to click in and out of the car, the stroller, most shopping carts, and even some restaurants have holders for them. If your baby doesn't mind being in it, it's a very convenient way to carry baby around, especially when they're really tiny. It's also a great option for winter babies because you can do the bundling/buckling inside before taking them outside to a cold car. That way you're not buckling them into a cold car seat, and they can stay bundled the whole time to and from the car.
- How much room do you have between your front and back seats for a rear-facing car seat? All car seats are not created equally when it comes to measurement. Some car seats (especially convertible ones) don't fit compatibly with certain car models. Do your homework here before purchasing. My convertible car seat did not fit rear-facing in my husband's truck. *facepalm*
- How long do you plan to have your child rear-facing? In PA where I live, the regulation currently states that a child must be rear-facing in a car seat until they reach one year old. However, most resources are suggesting that children be rear-faced to at least 2 years old, and many states are changing their regulations to reflect that, so keep weight limits and this timeframe in mind when choosing a car seat. Chances are that you will need to have a convertible car seat that suits your car while rear-facing, so be prepared for that scenario.
- Will baby be riding in multiple cars on a regular basis? If so, I definitely recommend having an infant seat with multiple bases. That way the child can be buckled in and snapped into whichever car is applicable at the time with no switching car seats back and forth between cars. Depending on your financial situation you could always buy more than one convertible, but for us that hasn't been necessary. Usually whoever is driving the child just takes the car with the seat already in it.
- Do you plan to have multiple children? If so, do yourself a favor and choose a gender neutral pattern and color scheme. The pink car seats are really adorable for little girls, but most dads wouldn't be happy to have their son riding around in one, and most people can't afford to purchase a new one on account of color.
Now on to the seats I personally have:
A friend allowed us to purchase her used Grace Snugride car seat for a great price, and it was such a blessing! The link is not the actual seat that I have, as the pattern we have is no longer sold, but that's the same seat. Be careful about buying used seats! If a car seat has been in a car accident, it needs to be replaced and cannot be used anymore. There's no way to know for sure if the pieces have been weakened or compromised. Now, I trusted my friend and knew she had not been in any accidents, but if you don't personally know and trust the person who used the seat, I would strongly suggest buying new. There are a lot of ways to save money in baby products, but compromising something as important as a car seat is not the place to be doing that.
I liked this car seat as it functioned well, cleaned easily and everything like that. My one complaint was the weight limit. Many infant seats now have weight limits much higher, like 30-35 lbs, but this one is only up to 22 lbs. As I already said, my daughter outgrew the weight limit earlier than I would have liked, so we were forced to buy a new seat earlier than I had planned. For this reason, I will be purchasing a different bucket seat on the next time around. (My used Graco will have expired by the time any subsequent children come around, so I won't be using it again.) For my next infant seat I am currently considering the Chicco Keyfit 30 and the Baby Trend Flex Loc.
As for the convertible car seat, we purchased the Safety 1st Complete Air 65. Our daughter has ridden in this seat both rear-facing and forward-facing and I absolutely love it. I wouldn't buy any other seat when/if I would need a new one. Its straps are easily adjustable, its latch/tether system are very easy to install (easier than the infant seat!), the 'wings' around the child's head make me feel safe about her head being secure, it's padded for comfort, and it even comes with a cup holder. One online review I saw complained that their child can't see past the 'wings' that stick out around the child's head, but I'm okay with that. I really appreciate the extra head support! When the little ones fall asleep in the car, as they are wont to do, their heads won't bob and bounce around nearly as much with these supports in place.
My one complaint about this car seat: If your child happens to have the flu in the car, and vomits all over themselves to the point of it soaking behind them into the back piece of the car seat, this is very hard to clean. The outer pad on the car seat is removable and machine washable, but there is a piece on the back that does not come off and must be only spot-cleaned. The same is true for the wonderful 'wings' I've been so in love with. I was very frustrated to find that I could not take those off to wash the vomit out of them when this happened to us a few months ago. I pray that doesn't happen to you, but it's something to note.
- Will you be using both an infant seat and convertible car seat, or will you be using a convertible one right from the start? We used an infant seat (I call it 'the bucket') from the time my daughter was born to the time she outgrew the weight limit at 7 months. Check the weight limits on the car seats you're buying - for us the 22 lb limit was not enough to last past 7 months. I do like the ease of use with an infant seat, though. It's simple to click in and out of the car, the stroller, most shopping carts, and even some restaurants have holders for them. If your baby doesn't mind being in it, it's a very convenient way to carry baby around, especially when they're really tiny. It's also a great option for winter babies because you can do the bundling/buckling inside before taking them outside to a cold car. That way you're not buckling them into a cold car seat, and they can stay bundled the whole time to and from the car.
- How much room do you have between your front and back seats for a rear-facing car seat? All car seats are not created equally when it comes to measurement. Some car seats (especially convertible ones) don't fit compatibly with certain car models. Do your homework here before purchasing. My convertible car seat did not fit rear-facing in my husband's truck. *facepalm*
- How long do you plan to have your child rear-facing? In PA where I live, the regulation currently states that a child must be rear-facing in a car seat until they reach one year old. However, most resources are suggesting that children be rear-faced to at least 2 years old, and many states are changing their regulations to reflect that, so keep weight limits and this timeframe in mind when choosing a car seat. Chances are that you will need to have a convertible car seat that suits your car while rear-facing, so be prepared for that scenario.
- Will baby be riding in multiple cars on a regular basis? If so, I definitely recommend having an infant seat with multiple bases. That way the child can be buckled in and snapped into whichever car is applicable at the time with no switching car seats back and forth between cars. Depending on your financial situation you could always buy more than one convertible, but for us that hasn't been necessary. Usually whoever is driving the child just takes the car with the seat already in it.
- Do you plan to have multiple children? If so, do yourself a favor and choose a gender neutral pattern and color scheme. The pink car seats are really adorable for little girls, but most dads wouldn't be happy to have their son riding around in one, and most people can't afford to purchase a new one on account of color.
Now on to the seats I personally have:
A friend allowed us to purchase her used Grace Snugride car seat for a great price, and it was such a blessing! The link is not the actual seat that I have, as the pattern we have is no longer sold, but that's the same seat. Be careful about buying used seats! If a car seat has been in a car accident, it needs to be replaced and cannot be used anymore. There's no way to know for sure if the pieces have been weakened or compromised. Now, I trusted my friend and knew she had not been in any accidents, but if you don't personally know and trust the person who used the seat, I would strongly suggest buying new. There are a lot of ways to save money in baby products, but compromising something as important as a car seat is not the place to be doing that.
I liked this car seat as it functioned well, cleaned easily and everything like that. My one complaint was the weight limit. Many infant seats now have weight limits much higher, like 30-35 lbs, but this one is only up to 22 lbs. As I already said, my daughter outgrew the weight limit earlier than I would have liked, so we were forced to buy a new seat earlier than I had planned. For this reason, I will be purchasing a different bucket seat on the next time around. (My used Graco will have expired by the time any subsequent children come around, so I won't be using it again.) For my next infant seat I am currently considering the Chicco Keyfit 30 and the Baby Trend Flex Loc.
As for the convertible car seat, we purchased the Safety 1st Complete Air 65. Our daughter has ridden in this seat both rear-facing and forward-facing and I absolutely love it. I wouldn't buy any other seat when/if I would need a new one. Its straps are easily adjustable, its latch/tether system are very easy to install (easier than the infant seat!), the 'wings' around the child's head make me feel safe about her head being secure, it's padded for comfort, and it even comes with a cup holder. One online review I saw complained that their child can't see past the 'wings' that stick out around the child's head, but I'm okay with that. I really appreciate the extra head support! When the little ones fall asleep in the car, as they are wont to do, their heads won't bob and bounce around nearly as much with these supports in place.
My one complaint about this car seat: If your child happens to have the flu in the car, and vomits all over themselves to the point of it soaking behind them into the back piece of the car seat, this is very hard to clean. The outer pad on the car seat is removable and machine washable, but there is a piece on the back that does not come off and must be only spot-cleaned. The same is true for the wonderful 'wings' I've been so in love with. I was very frustrated to find that I could not take those off to wash the vomit out of them when this happened to us a few months ago. I pray that doesn't happen to you, but it's something to note.
Changing Table/Stations
A little story to start this one off...
While registering for baby things, my wonderful hubby was good about mostly just letting me do the choosing. However, being 2nd out of 9 children in his family, he knows a thing or two about child care, and I did value his input. One thing we disagreed on was the need for a changing pad/table. I was so convinced it was a necessary part of baby's room, while he was convinced it was just one of those things that the baby manufacturers convince mothers that they need when they really don't. Our disagreement was satisfied when a changing pad and soft terry cover were gifted to us.
Fast forward to the arrival of our beautiful baby girl. Since our master bedroom is on the first floor along with the kitchen, bathroom and other essentials, we spend almost all of our time on our first floor. What postpartum mama wants to trek up and down the stairs 6-8 times a day just in the name of changing a diaper? Not me. I can honestly say I changed her diaper on the changing pad (which we compromised on and fixed to the top of her dresser instead of having a separate table) one time. Once. In her almost two years of life.
So my advice is this: get a caddy like the Thirty-One Mini Organizer or this and put it in the room where you will be spending the most time with baby. That may be your bedroom, baby's bedroom, your living room - whatever. You may even want two - one for upstairs and one for downstairs if you have a multiple level home. Keep your diapering essentials there and leave it at that. It's handy, it's portable - practicality for the win!
Happy diapering!
*I realize that two of my posts have now mentioned my lack of wanting to climb stairs - that probably makes me sound like a lazy bum. But just remember that no matter how you deliver or how well your baby sleeps - there's bound to be some soreness and exhaustion involved in your life with a newborn. Also, our stairs are steep and have a history of tripping people, so after I fell down the stairs at 6 weeks postpartum, I became less concerned with appearing lazy and more concerned with the safety hazard of maneuvering stairs during that middle-of-the-night stupor. Thankfully I wasn't carrying my baby when it happened, but it could have been much worse than just my bruised tush and sore muscles.
While registering for baby things, my wonderful hubby was good about mostly just letting me do the choosing. However, being 2nd out of 9 children in his family, he knows a thing or two about child care, and I did value his input. One thing we disagreed on was the need for a changing pad/table. I was so convinced it was a necessary part of baby's room, while he was convinced it was just one of those things that the baby manufacturers convince mothers that they need when they really don't. Our disagreement was satisfied when a changing pad and soft terry cover were gifted to us.
Fast forward to the arrival of our beautiful baby girl. Since our master bedroom is on the first floor along with the kitchen, bathroom and other essentials, we spend almost all of our time on our first floor. What postpartum mama wants to trek up and down the stairs 6-8 times a day just in the name of changing a diaper? Not me. I can honestly say I changed her diaper on the changing pad (which we compromised on and fixed to the top of her dresser instead of having a separate table) one time. Once. In her almost two years of life.
So my advice is this: get a caddy like the Thirty-One Mini Organizer or this and put it in the room where you will be spending the most time with baby. That may be your bedroom, baby's bedroom, your living room - whatever. You may even want two - one for upstairs and one for downstairs if you have a multiple level home. Keep your diapering essentials there and leave it at that. It's handy, it's portable - practicality for the win!
Happy diapering!
*I realize that two of my posts have now mentioned my lack of wanting to climb stairs - that probably makes me sound like a lazy bum. But just remember that no matter how you deliver or how well your baby sleeps - there's bound to be some soreness and exhaustion involved in your life with a newborn. Also, our stairs are steep and have a history of tripping people, so after I fell down the stairs at 6 weeks postpartum, I became less concerned with appearing lazy and more concerned with the safety hazard of maneuvering stairs during that middle-of-the-night stupor. Thankfully I wasn't carrying my baby when it happened, but it could have been much worse than just my bruised tush and sore muscles.
Sunday, June 10, 2012
Sleeping Arrangements
This whole situation will be highly affected by your opinions on attachment parenting & co-sleeping (and its various forms), the layout of your house, the personality of your baby, whether or not you'll be nursing... this is highly dependent on circumstance. Here's my experience.
From the time my daughter was born until she was 3 months old, she slept in our room in this bassinet. I chose this for several reasons. In our house, the master bedroom is on the first floor, and my daughter's room was on the second floor. I felt it was better for the sake of convenience and not falling down the stairs in the middle of the night that I keep her in our room until she was sleeping through the night consistently (we moms use that term loosely, but... I think you get the point). I really loved this bassinet because it was affordable, had adjustable height levels for age/size of baby, and was small enough to fit in our small room. A standard play yard size simply wouldn't have fit in our room, so this was an easy choice!
When sweet baby decided to start sleeping like a big girl at such a young age (don't hate me!), we went ahead and moved her upstairs to her crib at 3 months old. By that time she was sleeping a 3-hr stretch and then a 5-7 hr stretch, so there wasn't much middle-of-the-night stair-climbing. I got our crib on Craigslist - a grandma in our area had bought a brand new crib for her granddaughter, who slept there only a handful of times. It was such a good price and it was local, so I went for it. If you do buy on Craigslist, make sure to check your crib model for recalls. There have been a lot of crib recalls lately, especially on drop-side cribs, and the company will either replace it or send a recall kit to replace/fix the parts in question.
About the crib mattress - some moms are brave enough to go used, but I wasn't. I figured our daughter will be sleeping on it for probably several years, and Lord willing so will a subsequent child (no I don't have any announcements to make!). We'll get plenty of use out of a new one, and I would rather have the peace of mind knowing that my child is sleeping on a pet-free, smoke-free, other-child-body-fluid-free mattress.
From the time my daughter was born until she was 3 months old, she slept in our room in this bassinet. I chose this for several reasons. In our house, the master bedroom is on the first floor, and my daughter's room was on the second floor. I felt it was better for the sake of convenience and not falling down the stairs in the middle of the night that I keep her in our room until she was sleeping through the night consistently (we moms use that term loosely, but... I think you get the point). I really loved this bassinet because it was affordable, had adjustable height levels for age/size of baby, and was small enough to fit in our small room. A standard play yard size simply wouldn't have fit in our room, so this was an easy choice!
When sweet baby decided to start sleeping like a big girl at such a young age (don't hate me!), we went ahead and moved her upstairs to her crib at 3 months old. By that time she was sleeping a 3-hr stretch and then a 5-7 hr stretch, so there wasn't much middle-of-the-night stair-climbing. I got our crib on Craigslist - a grandma in our area had bought a brand new crib for her granddaughter, who slept there only a handful of times. It was such a good price and it was local, so I went for it. If you do buy on Craigslist, make sure to check your crib model for recalls. There have been a lot of crib recalls lately, especially on drop-side cribs, and the company will either replace it or send a recall kit to replace/fix the parts in question.
About the crib mattress - some moms are brave enough to go used, but I wasn't. I figured our daughter will be sleeping on it for probably several years, and Lord willing so will a subsequent child (no I don't have any announcements to make!). We'll get plenty of use out of a new one, and I would rather have the peace of mind knowing that my child is sleeping on a pet-free, smoke-free, other-child-body-fluid-free mattress.
Diapers!
This could be a novel, for sure! As a couponer, I've tried several brands that are available in my area. Whatever I can get a good deal on, that's the product I'm trying that week. Here's what I've found.
Pampers Cruisers - These diapers were great when my daughter was smaller (and thus having less intake/output), but now that she's older, bigger, and prone to larger amounts of wetness, they just don't hold enough to suit me. Definitely not an overnight diaper for an older baby.
Pampers Swaddlers - These are great for the newborns and smaller infants. They can be expensive, but there are often sales and coupons to take advantage of, so stock up when you can find a good price. They're gentle, and fit well to keep leaks to a minimum. Blow outs from the little ones are inevitable but these are good at controlling the mess as well as could be expected.
Huggies Snug & Dry - They're not quite as good quality as the Pampers, but they do the job. If they get too full overnight, they do start to break down a tiny bit and you have to make sure to wipe the little granule things off of baby's bum. But they still keep her from wetting the bed!
Huggies Little Movers - These are just as good as the Pampers Cruisers, and they hold an appropriate amount for an older baby. My favorite diapers!
Huggies Slip-Ons - These are great once you have a child who can stand long enough for these to be pulled up. They break away on the sides so once full you can still take them off without any solids spilling out. They hold plenty of wetness for an older child also. The only reason these aren't quite my favorite is that the side closures are slightly less convenient than the front closures. They're more meant for one-time use.
Luvs - These are a great affordable option. They seem to have a little more fragrance added to them, so if your little one is sensitive to that, you might want to choose a different dipe. However, this is a no-frills diaper with all the necessary requirements. This is my go-to diaper when I do not have any good coupon deals lined up for the week on the other brands.
Seventh Generation - These are really great diapers! They hold plenty of quantity and they are really the best option if your baby is sensitive to fragrance, chemicals and other things of that sort. They're very gentle and effective. The biggest downfall is price - they are quite a bit more expensive than the others I'm reviewing here.
Parent's Choice/Walmart - This is a good option to try. These are definitely the most affordable diapers out there (if you're not watching coupon deals). My problem was that they never fit my daughter well, so they inevitably leaked. I know others who use these diapers and don't have problems with leaks, so it's worth a try to see if your little one fits them.
Walgreens - We have used these diapers a few times out of necessity. They're quite a bit like the Luvs - no frills, but they cover all the necessities. They're pretty reasonably priced also, except that they don't come in the higher quantity packages, so you end up paying a little bit more for them than you might for a high-volume box of Luvs or Walmart brand.
Up and Up/Target - I know a lot of moms who really love these diapers. For a lot of people this is a really good choice of affordability and quality. I love Target and I buy a lot of their Up and Up items, but for me personally I really do not like the closures on this diaper. I've bought them before and will probably buy them again because of their price, coupons and the fact that they accomplish the main goal of controlling wetness, but I prefer other brands when I can get them.
Pampers Cruisers - These diapers were great when my daughter was smaller (and thus having less intake/output), but now that she's older, bigger, and prone to larger amounts of wetness, they just don't hold enough to suit me. Definitely not an overnight diaper for an older baby.
Pampers Swaddlers - These are great for the newborns and smaller infants. They can be expensive, but there are often sales and coupons to take advantage of, so stock up when you can find a good price. They're gentle, and fit well to keep leaks to a minimum. Blow outs from the little ones are inevitable but these are good at controlling the mess as well as could be expected.
Huggies Snug & Dry - They're not quite as good quality as the Pampers, but they do the job. If they get too full overnight, they do start to break down a tiny bit and you have to make sure to wipe the little granule things off of baby's bum. But they still keep her from wetting the bed!
Huggies Little Movers - These are just as good as the Pampers Cruisers, and they hold an appropriate amount for an older baby. My favorite diapers!
Huggies Slip-Ons - These are great once you have a child who can stand long enough for these to be pulled up. They break away on the sides so once full you can still take them off without any solids spilling out. They hold plenty of wetness for an older child also. The only reason these aren't quite my favorite is that the side closures are slightly less convenient than the front closures. They're more meant for one-time use.
Luvs - These are a great affordable option. They seem to have a little more fragrance added to them, so if your little one is sensitive to that, you might want to choose a different dipe. However, this is a no-frills diaper with all the necessary requirements. This is my go-to diaper when I do not have any good coupon deals lined up for the week on the other brands.
Seventh Generation - These are really great diapers! They hold plenty of quantity and they are really the best option if your baby is sensitive to fragrance, chemicals and other things of that sort. They're very gentle and effective. The biggest downfall is price - they are quite a bit more expensive than the others I'm reviewing here.
Parent's Choice/Walmart - This is a good option to try. These are definitely the most affordable diapers out there (if you're not watching coupon deals). My problem was that they never fit my daughter well, so they inevitably leaked. I know others who use these diapers and don't have problems with leaks, so it's worth a try to see if your little one fits them.
Walgreens - We have used these diapers a few times out of necessity. They're quite a bit like the Luvs - no frills, but they cover all the necessities. They're pretty reasonably priced also, except that they don't come in the higher quantity packages, so you end up paying a little bit more for them than you might for a high-volume box of Luvs or Walmart brand.
Up and Up/Target - I know a lot of moms who really love these diapers. For a lot of people this is a really good choice of affordability and quality. I love Target and I buy a lot of their Up and Up items, but for me personally I really do not like the closures on this diaper. I've bought them before and will probably buy them again because of their price, coupons and the fact that they accomplish the main goal of controlling wetness, but I prefer other brands when I can get them.
Beginning and Disclaimer
Hi, friends!
I assume if you're reading this that you're a dear friend of mine who has asked me for my opinion on a baby product or two. I've got so many wonderful friends who are joining me on the motherhood journey that I thought I would just put my thoughts out here for anyone to reference at their leisure. I really hope this helps you as you pick and choose for yourself and your family!
Disclaimer: Every good opinion has a disclaimer, right? :) Well here's mine: this is my opinion and mine only - so you get what you pay for. ;) Every baby, every Mama, every Daddy, every household and every family has a different set of needs, personality, circumstances and logistics. What worked for us simply might not work for you. One of the big lessons I've learned on this motherhood path is that every family has to make decisions based on their own situations and I can only judge what is best for me and my own family. (And let's face it, sometimes I don't always make the right choice even then!)
Motherhood is full of so many decisions, it can be truly overwhelming. Take your time, read your resources, trust your gut. Remember not to be too hard on yourself when you mess up - we're all human, and we all do it. Your kids will mess up too. And they might as well learn from you how best to react when they do.
God bless your family and pleasant mothering to you!
I assume if you're reading this that you're a dear friend of mine who has asked me for my opinion on a baby product or two. I've got so many wonderful friends who are joining me on the motherhood journey that I thought I would just put my thoughts out here for anyone to reference at their leisure. I really hope this helps you as you pick and choose for yourself and your family!
Disclaimer: Every good opinion has a disclaimer, right? :) Well here's mine: this is my opinion and mine only - so you get what you pay for. ;) Every baby, every Mama, every Daddy, every household and every family has a different set of needs, personality, circumstances and logistics. What worked for us simply might not work for you. One of the big lessons I've learned on this motherhood path is that every family has to make decisions based on their own situations and I can only judge what is best for me and my own family. (And let's face it, sometimes I don't always make the right choice even then!)
Motherhood is full of so many decisions, it can be truly overwhelming. Take your time, read your resources, trust your gut. Remember not to be too hard on yourself when you mess up - we're all human, and we all do it. Your kids will mess up too. And they might as well learn from you how best to react when they do.
God bless your family and pleasant mothering to you!
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